Dog Days

At the beach with wonderful friends last week

It's been a helluva summer.  And in the best possible way.  We had our freedom.  No hospitalizations.  No ER visits.  A summer of health and normalcy.  A summer with friends and playgrounds and vacations.  A summer that every child and family deserves to have, but so many in the cancer world do not get to experience once a diagnosis comes into their lives.

I think that part of the reason that this summer was so very wonderful for us is that we are so aware of how different a summer can be with a kid who has cancer.  After all, last summer was so very, very different for us.  Fionn was newly diagnosed.  Our world was still spinning.  We spent the majority of June in the hospital.  After that, Fionn had a PICC line for half of July which meant that he couldn't get his arm wet.  So no pools.  No spray parks.  Getting Fionn's port in mid-July was a huge improvement, and he was finally able to run through a spray park by the end of the month.  But still...we were in the trenches.  Home care and weekly hospital visits.  Long chemo infusions on days where we should have been running around at the pool.  Fionn lost his hair.  He also lost muscle in his legs and needed to be carried up the stairs a lot.  We couldn't make plans or play dates or do anything without hesitation.  Life felt like a struggle at times.  A lot of times.

Fionny after his port surgery

So perhaps that's why this summer was such a joy.  Yes, the boys were complete rascals most of the time, and I had days when my patience was paper thin.  Of course.  I'm human.  But it was hard to stay annoyed for too long. Good God, we were outside!  We went through countless bottles of sunscreen this summer, and that was such a blessing!  If there is one thing (and there are many things) I have learned from being a Cancer Mom, it is this.  Normalcy is the best gift.  Man, it's just the greatest.  It should not be taken for granted.  Ever.  And I won't.  I will have my bad days, and I will scream at my children, and I will have a 4 pm cocktail to get through the evening.  And I will make mistakes and feel annoyed at myself.  Also, I will feel worn thin and so in need of a break.  But at the same time, I will be appreciative.  I will realize that there are moms and dads out there who would do anything (truly, anything) to have those problems.  They would do anything to have a kid who is so full of energy that he is tearing the house apart with his antics.  Anything to have the luxury to gripe about the emotionality of a two-year-old with an applesauce addiction (it's a real thing, people) as one of the day's biggest problems.  I carry that around with me at all times, and I am grateful that I do.  It provides healthy perspective.  And we can all use some of that sometimes if you ask me.

As the dog days of a truly wonderful summer come to a close, we are preparing for another exciting chapter in our lives.  Fionny starts Kindergarten on Monday!  Can you believe it?  Our little dude in Kindergarten?  Sometimes it seems crazy to me that we are already here, and other times I can't believe Fionny has only been in this world for 5 years.  What an impact he has made on our lives and the lives of those who know him.  We love our Fionny boy!  I'll update again through tears at some point next week, I am sure.  Until then...

Fionny on his first day of preschool last year